RIP Stanley

Well friends, it's New Years Eve. The time that people are looking back and looking forward. As I look back on the past year I'm struck by many things, it's been a year of big change for me, and I think I would say that it's been the best year in Denver. However, in these last two weeks of the year I've been sad and I'm afraid I'll always remember 2008 as the year of Stanely.

Granted, he moved in with me in 2007, but we didn't interact much during that year. He spent most of it under the bathtub, and I spent that time trying to ignore him, hoping it would entice him to come out. In 2008 though, I locked the bathroom to him and he moved to hanging out under my bed, and sitting on my blue hand-me-down chair. Little by little he would come out more while I was home. There were even a few times where he would come by and sniff my feet before hopping up in his chair and one frightening moment for him when I was cleaning out his litter box and the two of us were stuck in the bathroom. He was crying to be let out poor guy - too close for comfort.

When I left for Christmas vacation, he was acting a little strange - and so I asked a friend to look in on him more closely than we had talked about. Sadly, he passed while I was out of town and it's been really strange to be back. I find myself continuing my habits of accommodating him even though he's not in the apartment. I listen for him, I watch for him to come out of hiding while I'm watching television, and he doesn't come. If you would have asked me a month ago how attached I was to Stanley, I would have told you that I wasn't really attached to him. I guess I just didn't realize how much he'd become a part of my life.

Here's to 2009. To continuing my habits of living better, and to finding peace with Stanley.

Happy New Year! Love, Maria

Home Sweet Home

A belated Merry Christmas to whoever is still reading this blog! I saw this morning that I haven't posted in about two weeks - it's been a busy two weeks!

After Mia's party, when I started my dress on fire, I finished out the week with a couple more parties and on Saturday morning headed out to the cold cold Midwest. I had a great Christmas with my family - we spent part of a week at my sister's house in small-town Illinois and part of the week at my parent's house in Grand Rapids. I was happy to spend time with my family and to be able to connect with some great friends!

Right now the memory of it all is a bit of a blur. For those of you following my family traditions - my Grandma got the black coal for being pulled over by the police for speeding and for crashing a full dinner table onto the ground. I'm not sure of the entire story, I'm just glad it was worse than starting a favorite dress on fire. I was certainly in the running for that little snafu.

I hope that you had a wonderful holiday.

That's Hot!

I was so hot last night, and sadly, not in that Paris Hilton kind of a way. Sheralee had a fabulous party to celebrate the anniversary of the night Mia came home last December. It was a great soiree with cocktail dresses, cocktails, tons of people, and poor Mia hiding in the closet. I'm sure she was thankful to have that closet as opposed to being outside in the sub-zero temperatures, but she hid most of the night nonetheless.

At one point I was talking with a few people in the doorway between the living room and the dining room and I suddenly felt warmth near my leg. I had been standing right over this great little candle on a stand and it started my dress on fire! My favorite Carnegie Hall dress. There was a bit of flame, but mostly I think the dress melted. I'm very hopeful that a good seamstress can mend this dress. It is my favorite dress!

Don't worry. I'm not hurt. The flame only got my dress and nothing more in the apartment. I did, however, leave little pieces of dress all over the apartment because little hard melted parts kept crumbling off. Yes, my dress is crumbling!

Temperature Wars

Everyone has them. You know, the stereotypical the man is hot, the woman is cold and they keep turning the thermostat back and forth and back and forth. Part of me wishes for that temperature war, at least I would have a thermostat to deal with.

Instead I'm in a temperature war with my landlord, and according to her, some of the other tenants in our building. In the spirit of full disclosure, I don't pay directly for my heat. I'm very thankful for this most of the time because it means my rent is the same every month and I don't have to move my budget around to deal with the gas bill. However, I think (or at least for the sake of everyone else in the building I hope) that my unit is the hottest unit in the building. I keep my window open 90% of the time in the winter and that gets me on average around 70 degrees in the apartment, give or take a few degrees. I don't particularly like this arrangement, but I'm willing to compromise seeing as there are about 30 units in the building and the Landlord claims that she has to buy space heaters for some of the units because they are just that cold. I dream about being in one of those units.

This weekend Santa must have had his fans on or something because it's been frigid. Last night it got down to -18 and at 11:00, I'm not sure we've made it above zero yet. I didn't have the windows open yesterday afternoon and it was perfect - quiet and comfortable. So when I left to go out with some friends I didn't open the window. BIG mistake. I was gone less than four hours and when I got home it was a tropical 79 degrees in my apartment. So I slept with the window open as long as I could stand it, but as you'll imagine with -18 outside, it really cooled off in there. I closed the window around 1:00 and when I got up at 6:30 it was once again tropical - this time only 77 degrees though.

If this keeps up I think I'll have to move before the end of winter. I can't remember the last time I got a full night's sleep. I alternate between waking up in a sweat, even with almost no covers, or being startled awake by someone being loud outside. I've asked my landlord again to turn down the heat. We'll see what happens.

Maria is Looking Forward to Christmas Vacation

I can not wait for Christmas vacation. Today hit a major day in the countdown - the day December 20 shows up in the 10 day forecast on weather.com so I can start tracking what kind of weather we'll be having on the day of my flight. As of this morning, it looks great. I do however realize (even though I want to deny it) that the 10 day out weather forecast has maybe a 10% chance of being accurate.

I'm looking forward to Christmas Vacation this year more than I have since I moved to Denver I think. The past 3 Christmases I've flown out a few days before Christmas and flown back here on Christmas Day. (Or at least that was the plan - the year of the blizzard everything got turned upside down.) It was good to have some time away and yet the function of my having a new job every fall had left me with no time off around the holidays. This year I will be gone 8 days, I will not have to travel on Christmas Day, and I've held down a job all year. (I really never thought at my age now that I'd be proud of holding down a job for a year. Oh, how life changes us.)

So, for this one time, I hope that the forecasters are right when they say that it will be cold in Denver and at Midway. Cold, but sunny!

Maria is impatient.

I miss facebook! It had become part of my morning routine to come into work, turn on the emails and then see what my friends had been up to the previous day. Then my company blocked facebook. If I was in management I may have done the same thing, and that didn't stop a proverbial tear from falling.

Since then I've ordered a new computer! Well - a new computer for me in any case and I can not wait for it to come. It hasn't shipped yet, and when I asked about when it might ship I was told "We're a little backlogged on those at the moment." I've sent a response asking exactly what that means. Backed up a couple days, a couple months, what? I mean - I'm heading nearby there tomorrow around 4:30, could I just stop by and pick it up?

To be fair, I'm looking forward to having this computer for much more than facebook. I'm excited to watch tv and movies online, to talk to my family with the webcam, to have the possibility of editing and sending pictures should I ever start taking them again, to be able to look for directions and check the bus schedule while I'm at home, to be able to check flight status over the weekend and the list goes on and on.

This is why I'm impatient!

Advent

One of the topics I haven't actively been writing about on this blog lately has been my inner journey. I'm still on one (aren't we all) it's just been so much more subtle lately that I'm not sure what to write about it. I know that I am far more content on this slower journey of opening up to new things and examining old ones in a slow and steady Maria pace.

That said I'm trying out a new Advent rhythm this year. Advent for many years for me was full of pageantry and ritual - much of which I either didn't understand, or had become so regular that it lost meaning completely. The last few months I've slowly been immersing myself in a new group here in Denver and I've chosen to celebrate Advent their style this year. It means some of the same ritual but approached in a much more relaxed manner. An approach I can relate to, and connect with. I feel much more of a connection this year with the longing of Israel and the ways in which their world was on the one hand going to change dramatically and yet on the other hand in the time of the advent the actions were subtle.

And so I feel as though the hope I'm living in at the moment is that the subtle world that I seem to be living in today is precursor to dramatic changes that may be coming. As I say that it shares the living hell out of me - I deal with dramatic change oh so well.

How Many Times Can I Say Refrigerator?

I finally have a new refrigerator! Ever since I moved into my current apartment I've been a little upset about the refrigerator. It's old school, which in and of itself I don't mind, but it does not have a frost free freezer. That I did mind. What always bothered me about it was that I moved into a different unit than the one I looked at when considering the apartment, and the first apartment had a nicer refrigerator. The first apartment was nicer altogether, but that's another story.

In any case the last time I defrosted the freezer I knocked it's door off. This door had been breaking since before I moved in, and long story short, my landlord got me a new refrigerator instead of having it fixed. (yay!) The new refrigerator was delivered on Sunday and the door was facing the opposite of what makes sense for my kitchen so I thought I'd undertake the task of switching the door. Ha! Turns out this is probably a two person job, but being the stubborn person that I am, I was determined to do it myself.

I succeeded! Not, however, without giving myself a black eye and a nasty cut. Using tools is hard! I'm told that the black eye isn't that noticable, but man, I feel like my eye is shouting "Look at me! Look at me!"

Perfect Getaway

This past weekend Sheralee and I escaped to Glen-Isle Resort in Bailey, CO. I can not tell you how wonderful this weekend was. We were in the mountains, so it really felt like we were getting away. Plus, something about drinking coffee and wine all day long, eating smores for breakfast and having absolutely no agenda was refreshing and relaxing. Here's a picture of the living room of the cabin we stayed in:

This place was so perfect. We learned all about it from a woman who works there. Apparently it was built in 1900 as a venture by rich Denver businessmen who wanted a place to come and hunt. It ran that way for 20-some years until the Tripp family bought it in the 20s and the daughter of those owners still runs it today. She and her husband ran it beginning in the 50s and together they built 19 additional cabins, one of which we stayed in. The grounds were full of old cars and all sorts of fun stuff, I can't wait to go back!

Sheralee took all three of these pictures. If you want to see more pictures, email me and I'll send you the link.

Who's a Cute Little Jealous?

OMG - I realized in a big way this week that I am jealous. I'm not sure exactly what to do with this realization, or how to change. I just know that I am acutely aware of this state of being this week.

There are so many kinds and levels of jealousy. This week I specifically realized I am jealous that people I know are expanding their social networks and I am still, 3 years after moving to Denver, stuck stuck stuck. This little jealousy of mine puts me into a funk anytime someone is busy when I want to go out, or anytime I'm out in a group of people trying to forge some sort of bond and nothing grows, or anytime I put myself out there and seem to get stomped on.

There, I said it. It's been my experience that saying something in a sense brings it fully into being instead of hiding in the shadows. Once it fully exists it's so much easier to do something about it, even if that something is just learning how to live with it.

Short Rant

You know what I don't like? I don't like it when people disagree just for the sake of disagreeing or just to see if they can get a reaction out of me. I don't like it because I usually fall for it. I don't like it because I'm generally a harmonious person who prefers to discuss and not argue. I don't like it because it seems like a waste of energy to me. There are plenty of things to legitimately disagree about why waste time and energy arguing when it doesn't matter.

I was out with someone this weekend who insisted on pushing and arguing about nothing. This person even bragged about how he really enjoyed doing this. Three days later it's still bothering me! I think it's time to let it go and move on.

Anniversary

A personally important anniversary went by yesterday, and I nearly forgot about it. Yesterday marked my unofficial one-year anniversary at my current job. I say unofficial because I was placed in this job with a placement agency so yesterday marked the one-year anniversary of the first day I sat at this desk, but the company won't acknowledge one year for me until January when I became a direct employee of the company. That day holds so much less significance for me.

I find this anniversary to be significant because it marks the longest that I've held a job in Denver. A year is twice as long as the shortest job I've had here. Even more significantly, I still like this job. I think the longest I liked one of the three (or technically four) other jobs I've had in this city was 2 months. That could be a generous estimate.

In this month of Thanksgiving I'm so thankful to have a job that I like, that pays my bills, and that is as solid as is possible in these economic times.

Quest

Now that Halloween has come and gone in all it's glory I'm beginning my quest for the perfect holiday party top. I had one last year that I loved. L. O. V. E. D. Loved. Then I ruined it when I thought my iron was on low, when in fact it was on high. So I'm back on a quest.

I've just returned from Forever 21 (or Forever a Ho - Thanks Kathy) and while that's usually a sure bet for party tops they didn't wow me this time around. I'm hoping they get some more party tops in during the next couple of weeks so I can go back and find something amazing.

Is this the most important thing going on today? Absolutely not! I'm just so excited about the holiday season that I can not stop myself from focusing on this quest. Happy fall and happy historic week to all of you.

I voted

I have the sticker to prove it. This is my second time voting since moving to Denver and it was a whole lot easier this time around. The last time I voted I went after work, and even though I had the opportunity to leave the office at 4:30 that year, I was still caught in the after work rush and stood in line for 2 hours. Denver was having voting issues that year. This year they canned the computer system that caused all the problems last time around, reinstated regular precincts instead of letting you vote at the location most convenient to you, and let anyone who wanted to vote early. This meant that when I went to my polling place there was no line and I was there for maybe 15 minutes. I also like that for voting you can bring a cheat sheet - no memorizing like it's a test or something.

I'm more interesting in watching the outcome of this election than I think I've ever been. I'm just hoping that votes will be counted on time and we don't have to watch long into the night.

Ahh, The Weekend!

I had a great Halloween weekend! Sarah Palin was a hit almost everywhere I went, and surprisingly I only saw one other Sarah while we were out. I had a great time talking like her, and I was really thankful that no one got nasty, and that no one started swooning over how much they loved her. (Except for the cabbie, and it was a short cab ride.) I could have done without the ghost tour. You live and learn right?

Yesterday I was running errands and I saw this car parked one block from my house! I've seen a couple Mars Hill/Rob Bell Love Wins stickers in Denver, and I think this is the first time I've seen a car that obviously came from West Michigan. I didn't have any paper and pen with me, so I went to the store thinking I'd leave a note when I got home. Sadly, the car was gone when I returned about an hour later. So - if you read this and you have a beige sedan with Love Wins sticker that you drove from Michigan to Denver please zip me a note. It was nice to see a touch of something familiar that was out of place yesterday.

Guest Blogger

Sarah Palin would like to wish all the readers of Maria In Denver a Happy Halloween :)

Ahh the Car

If you're wondering why I haven't posted too much lately about not having a car, I think the reason is that for the most part it didn't change my habits and I really haven't missed it. This week however, was the first time that I really wished I had a car, or at least a bike. I've had a pretty full week and in the midst of it I had a couple of errands that needed to be run. Right now these errands take me about an hour. With the car, 10 minutes. It's those 50 minutes that I was pining over actually, not the car. Thankfully I have great friends who helped me out.

In other news I'm so excited for Halloween! Festivities this year include a Ghost Tour and dancing and I can not wait. Like 50% of the population I'm going as Sarah Palin this year. I'm really excited about my costume! I'll post some pictures so that you can enjoy the fun.

I Heart Candy Corn

For at least the last month there has been a basket of candy corn sitting out in my office. It is never empty and sometimes it even has those little orange and green pumpkins. I heart those pumpkins too. While I was on the detox it wasn't so hard to resist these sweet little gems, but since I've completed the detox and am eating limited amounts of sugar again I am having a hard time walking by the ever-full basket of candy corns.

Then I learned from this website that candy corn is gluten, dairy and soy free. Now they're completely irresistable. I wouldn't be surprised if they were full of corn syrup, which I'm also trying to avoid, but something in me doesn't care. I can't stop! I may have a problem.

Ladies and Gentlemen, well mostly Ladies, I watched a great movie, in great company last night. Sheralee hosted a movie night where we watched (with many discussion pauses) Iron Jawed Angels. It's an HBO movie starring Hilary Swank, Angelica Houston and Julia Ormond, among others, that chronicles the story of the Suffragettes who won women in the US the right to vote. I have to say that while I have actively avoided talking politics on this blog, this movie reminded me of the huge sacrifices women made just so that I could have the right to vote.

There was a time in this election hoopla where I had decided not to vote. Not because I didn't think my vote would count. Not because I didn't want to stand in line. Not because I was too lazy to figure out the issues and what I thought of them. No. Mostly it was because the United States I would like to see, is so radical that neither of the major party candidates come close to reflecting my views. Since declaring this I've realized that while I'm still torn about a great number of things I can step off of my ideological high horse and vote for a candidate that is closer. Until I'm ready to run, or until I'm as brave as these beautiful women, that's the best that I can do. It's the small, small way that I'm raising my voice.

Also, with that voice, I highly recommend adding this film to your Netflix cue. I know I'm glad Sheralee did.

Detox Update

Caption: Maria is jealous of a friend who escaped work.
OR - Maria is a little disspointed in the Detox experience.

Well - I finished the official 14 days of Detox. I have mixed feelings about the experience: I don't feel any better than I felt before I started the detox, and at the same time I think there are things to learn that may have not been discovered (at least for a while) without going through the detox.

I met with the nutritionist this morning and we talked through a lot of this. The main conclusion that she drew from my experience is that while some of my issues may certainly come from the foods I eat, there's something else going on. She has a load of suggestions for me, some of which I may follow through on, and some that I may not. The thing that she really wanted me to walk away with is that there are options. I don't have to live the rest of my life feeling a little bit sick all the time. I'm trying to find what that means for me, and how much more I want to sink into getting to the bottom of this, and how much I want to work to maintain where I've come to.

I walked away from the meeting pretty bummed out. I had hoped that I would see great results from this Detox and that I would feel great and work to maintain that healthy feeling. Instead, I feel just as I did before starting the detox: better than I did 4 months ago, and still not like I would like to feel.

The next official detox steps are finishing off the shakes in low dosages while slowly reintroducing foods into my diet. For right now I'm planning to do some version of it that will work for me. And by that I mean - I need a drink!

blah aahg glauhgh woiuglad

I was reminded this morning of something I've believed to be true for a while - laughter, specifically giggling can certainly help the mood! Here's my story:

I work in cubicle-land. It's not as bad as a lot of office plans I've seen but in the room I work in there are 12 cubicles, about half of which are inhabited by support staff like me and the other half house junior brokers who are on the phone a lot. It gets noisy. I'm on one end and on the opposite end is a loud man with a low voice who on occasion gets really excited on the phone. The thing is, the only noise that gets all the way to me is his laughter and some muffled sounds. So from where I'm sitting it sounds like he is a crazy person who roams the 16th Street Mall talking to the voices in his head. It bothers me usually. However this morning I decided to share my frustration with a friend who sits in the cube next to me by chatting with her about it on Gchat - and it turned into this hysterical conversation. I'm slightly afraid that it's one of those you-had-to-be-there moments, but I typed the above phrase "blah aahg glaughg woiuglad" to describe what I heard and the two of us dissolved into giggles. It certainly helped to dispel some of the monotony of office life.

I'm hoping this little life lesson reminds me to keep laughing and to try to keep things light to dispel the boredom that often hits working in cubicle-land. Here's to more laughter.

Come Skiing!

I live in a state that is crazy fun and crazy strange. There are two ski areas - Arapahoe Basin and Loveland - that compete every year to see who will be the first to open. Tomorrow, October 15, they're both schedule to open at 8:30 am. October people. This is just crazy to me - especially since in June of this year Aspen had enough snow that they decided to open for a weekend or two. In June.

It pains me to say this, but part of me is enjoying this change in the season. I'm not enjoying shivering the days away at work, and at the same time I am enjoying long hot baths, candlelight, snuggling up under a blanket, and surprisingly the smell that comes when the radiators in my building are running. That said, it is still crazy to me that ski season here can be 8 months long. I think my next move might be to San Diego. Thankfully they're predicting that Denver will be back in the 70s by the end of this week.

In short detox news, two things. 1 - it was so nice to have breakfast back this morning. I've been having detox shakes for breakfast since Saturday and I miss a hot breakfast. 2 - it is strange to me that as I'm coming to the end of this detox it's starting to just feel like a routine. I'm afraid that coming out of the detox might be as much of an adjustment as going in. That said, my time on the shakes may be extended due to the fact that I haven't been digesting them too well. More on that later.

Detox: Day 11

I'm just coming off another low-key detox weekend. Winter or at least something that felt like winter, visited Denver, and it was nice to cozy up. I read, watched movies, lit candles, took a bath, and generally did nothing. The detox was starting to drive me a little crazy. This weekend marked my highest dosage of the supplements and my body was having a hard time adjusting to all of it. I talked to the nutritionist this morning (after she talked to some doctors at the manufacturer) and it turns out, the symptoms I'm experiencing are in line with someone who has IBS. We're now taking some steps to get me back on track and I'm hopeful that now I'll start feeling better. Feeling better being the reason that I jumped into this detox in the first place.

Not surprisingly this weekend turned quite introspective for me as well and I was struck with two things. First, I think I'm a little more affected by a recent break-up than I would like to admit to myself. Second, I let the fear of making mistakes, or of not doing something perfectly, stop me from trying things a lot of the time. This idea of trying, and then trying again, and not worrying too much about making mistakes struck me over and over in the things I read and the things I watched this weekend. So, I'm going to try and go with it. I'm hoping to try things and see what happens instead of trying to do things right or perfectly all the time. Maybe it'll be life changing. Who knows.

Detox: Day 8

Well it's day 8 and I talked to the nutritionist today about all these symptoms that I'm not having and I feel a bit better after talking with her. When we met to talk about the detox and what I might expect she told me about a number of different negative symptoms that people often encounter. So I had myself all geared up for that, and when it didn't happen I was starting to worry that it wasn't working.

I shared these fears with the nutritionist, and she assured me that yes, it is working. She also said that since I had been cutting gluten, dairy and caffeine out of my diet for quite a while before beginning the detox, I would most likely not experience some of the side-effects that many of her clients experience. In essence, some of the side-effects people experience, I already took care of months ago. I'm starting to see a bit of a difference where I'd hoped to - in my digestive system - and so I'll keep on until the thing is done.

In other news fall has hit Denver. It's downright chilly and grey out there today and part of me is looking forward to a weekend of cozying up and staying in.

Detox: Day 6

Here I am at Day 6 with the worst side-effect to date being that I am breaking out like crazy. I'm starting today to start feeling run down and a little headachy - nothing horrible, just that feeling that comes when you feel like you might be coming down with something. I'm told this is normal, and to not worry too much about it.

To this point I've felt pretty good. I've kept things low-key and acted "as if I were sick". Let's just say I've been watching a lot of movies. ;)

Things for me haven't been all that introspective to this point, so I'm sorry to report I haven't had a breakthrough, or even what feels like a decent thought. I did have a random bonding moment with a tough boss yesterday over the pain of going gluten free. Her nutritionist suggested it also, and so we kvetched.

At the end of tomorrow I'll be halfway through. I hope the second half goes by as quickly as the second half :)

Detox: Day 4

Well it's Day 4 of the Detox and I think I'm just starting to see some of the effects. I think that the hardest part thus far has been drinking the shakes that contain my supplements. The powder never fully dissolves and so they're pretty chalky. I'm perfecting my shaking technique, and I think it's working. I've also learned that it's easier to stomach when mixed with fruit juice or rice milk. Ah the joy of learning.

Until yesterday afternoon and this morning I was starting to worry that this was all bullshit. (Pardon my french) However, I've begun feeling some of the side effects in my gut, and the nutritionist assures me that this is how things should be happening. I won't be on full dosage of the supplements until Friday of this week, so I guess that maybe I should just be a little patient.

The diet itself has been fairly easy to keep. The only exception being the rice cereal I had for breakfast yesterday morning. I think perhaps my 6 month old niece and I had the same thing for breakfast yesterday. If the menu planner suggests that for me for breakfast again, I will choose something else!

So, the moral of the story for today is: so far so good :)

Detox Journal

I have a gut (no pun intended) feeling that this blog may turn into a detox journal for the next two weeks. Today I started a two week cleanse - under the supervision of my nutritionist. So please don't worry, this is safe.

The detox consists of a restricted diet - no gluten, no dairy, no soy, no oranges, no corn, no refined sugar, no caffeine and a short list of meats (i.e. I can have chicken but not beef). This is not much different than the diet I'm already on per her recommendations this summer - and I've been feeling like a different person. On top of the restricted diet I'll be taking some supplements. They're from a company called Metagenics and the regimen I'll be taking is called SUSTAIN. Feel free to google it if you're really interested. :) It works (in the words of the nutritionist) like a broom to sweep out all the toxins that my body is housing. Right now they're tucked away, not causing any specific harm, but the idea is that the build up is what may be causing some of my discomfort.

When those toxins are released I may see some side effects and that's where the Detox Journal comes in. I may just need to vent, or keep track. Or - the nutritionist suggested that a lot of times this process turns very introspective - and as longtime (if you can call 2.5 years longtime) readers of this blog know that for me turning introspective sometimes means putting the things I've learned or that I'm thinking about out there. As though stating them for all to see makes it more real. More like something I can't avoid.

As an aside - I'm not sure about getting to the farmer's markets this weekend so I'm trying out a new service: Door to Door Organics. As the name suggests it's a delivery service that brings fresh fruits and veggies right to your door. (or in my case right to the office.) They're active in Denver and Grand Rapids - so I'll let you know how it works out just in case you're interested in trying it. I've also been tempted lately to utilize the local grocery store's delivery service. But I think I'll hold out on that until it gets really cold.

Wish me luck :)

Birthday Resolution

I've recently found it much more natural to make resolutions on my birthday instead of around New Year's. For one, it relates much more personally to my years on this earth, and the holiday season is so busy that starting something new when you're coming off the craziness seems like setting yourself up to fail.

This year my resolution is to start an Artist's Journal. I was presented with versions of this idea on two different occasions recently. One, in a small group, where a woman was talking about learning about the artist journal in art school, keeping one herself, and learning about someone she looks up to keeping one as well. The second was in a large group setting where an author was speaking of keeping notecards with her at all times and how some of her most favorite lines in her books had come from these notecards. All this in the span of about two weeks just prior to my birthday. It inspired me.

So I started the search for the perfect journal and found on etsy.com a few sellers who take vintage books and turn them into journals and thought - how clever! Then I found a journal made of an old art history book, and I thought how perfectly, beautifully ironic. I can't wait for it to arrive so I can start noting my observations!

Welcome 9news.com Comment Readers

I logged into my low-tech blog tracker this afternoon only to find a sudden surge in the number of hits this blog gets! I dug deeper to find that a 9news.com reader found my post about Disaster Restoration and posted a link. I echo watching5000 when I say that I too hope that 9 News continues to follow this story. Keep scrolling or click here for my original post about DRI.

To take this new twist even a bit further, some of my brand new hits are from none other than DRI's servers. (Hi former coworkers & bosses!) They're watching this story closely - not just up close and personal in the courtroom, but in the world of the Internet as well. Seems quite interesting to me.

Part of me is so tempted to post here the rumors that I've heard, the conclusions that I've drawn from those rumors, and all the things that I've been dying to say to the leadership at DRI. However, the past year has been full of dealing with unemployment, finding a job that pays significantly better with no abuse, and doing my best to forget that this place ever existed. For that (and other reasons), I'm not ready to jump back into the dark place I was in then. So count your lucky stars DRI jerks, I'm not going to badmouth you any more than I already have. You're not worth it.

Decadent

Yesterday I left work early for a meeting with my nutritionist. As I left work, I had this sense of awe, and the only thing I could figure out was that I was feeling luxurious. I left work early, and even though there were dying leaves on the ground it was so warm and pleasant. There's something about warm weather when the season is changing that really feels decadent to me.

I have to apologize for my lack of posting lately. The thing is that life is really good for me right now. I'm feeling better physically which has left my head in better space. I think all this positive space has proved my suspicion that I am using this blog as therapy.

Maybe I'll change the direction of this thing. We'll see.

Sweet Revenge

I read a story yesterday online that made my heart skip a beat. I then felt guilty about it because I really don't like to wish harm on people, but I do know that sometimes when you make poor choices it comes back to haunt you.

From October 2006 until August 2007 I was employed by a company called Disaster Restoration, Inc. I have not named them on this website until now for a number of reasons. 1, I don't want any employer of mine finding this blog if I can help it, and 2, I had nothing nice to say and was under a year long contract that threatened fines if I bad mouthed the company or any of its employees. I'm not sure that contract would have held up in court, but I was going with the better safe than sorry mantra on that one.

About 2 months into the job I showed up at work (along with all my coworkers) to find US Postal Inspectors serving a federal search warrant on the company with guns drawn. We were all herded into a back conference room, our contact information was taken, and we were ushered out of the building. I never got a straight answer from anyone what it was all about (typical I think of circumstances surrounding an ongoing investigation) but I knew the raid had something to do with an investigation into insurance and mail fraud. I knew that the company was under continuing investigation at least until I was let go last August and I have a sneaking suspicion that part of the reason I was let go was because the company couldn't keep up with its legal bills and pay its employees.

For the record, I hated that job with my entire being. I was not happy about being unemployed when I was fired, but I was certainly happy not to have to step foot in that building ever again. I was treated poorly, the job that I took was not the job that was presented to me in interviews, and someone raised their voice at me almost every day. Some of it is funny now - like when Michael Griggs was angry with me for something and he told me that it really "chaps his ass". Who says that!? Because I hated the job so much, and because I have zero respect for the leadership there I was almost giddy when I read the following articles:

General contractor, employees indicted on 60 counts

10 indicted in Denver in insurance fraud scheme

I felt a teensy bit guilty for being so excited that these men I had worked for were finally indicted because I'm not typically a believer in revenge. I'd like to think I'm a more graceful, live and let live kind of a girl. However, justice gave me a happy feeling in my belly today and I'm just going with it. The trial starts in two weeks. I'm very tempted to go and sit in the back of the courtroom and see what happens.

I'm back in Denver after a great trip to Michigan. I forgot my camera (wah wha) so I don't have any pictures to show you, but I can say that Doug's wedding was beautiful, I have some of the world's most adorable nieces, and from what I've heard this was one of the nicest weekends GR has seen all summer. All in all I had a great time.

On Sunday night I stole away from the family festivities (well technically I did that a couple times) to hang out with Burt and we ended up having dinner at Rose's with Tim, Stephanie and Catye. It was such a beautiful night - we were at the restaurant for a long time. First waiting for a patio table, and then sitting with a leisurely dinner and free desserts. I haven't laughed that hard in quite a long time. It's also rare that I feel that comfortable and that connected with a group of people. They are wonderful and I long for that here in Denver. Part of me wonders though if connection comes along once in a lifetime. And if not, how long does it take to cultivate it? To bring it to life? I'm not a very patient person - I like to have things now, when I want them. I just hope that I have the patience to let things grow.

On another front - I'm still pretty obsessed with the gluten-free diet. I did pretty good while I was in Michigan - better than I thought I would do. I could certainly notice though when I got a little in my system, so I'm doing my best to stick to it. I have three new recipes to try this week - I'm sure you'll hear about them.

Stop Bird Porn

I think I discovered today why I haven't seen any celebrities. It's because I don't have the patience for standing in a big crowd of people and pushing closer, closer just for a tiny glimpse of someone. Today at lunch when we were walking around there was a huge crowd of people outside the Hard Rock Cafe where it seemed there was some sort of VIP party going on. At one point there was a big cheer and the rumor was that it was for Oprah. Who knows, I couldn't see anything.

I got a teeny tiny bit closer to the big guy today though. I had to pick up a credential for tonight's event at Invesco for my boss and was meeting a woman at a hotel. (Sounds more like a drug exchange, I know.) When I got there it turned out she had been whisked away for a meeting with the candidate, so I walked back across the city to meet her at a different hotel when she was done meeting with him. So I shook a hand that had just been in his presence. Surprisingly not that thrilling.

I have now seen bunches of protesters. I still don't think they were any threat to our building, but i was walking on the 16th Street mall yesterday at Arapahoe when this big group of protesters came by and then the leaders with the bullhorns turned right toward where we were standing. I froze - thankfully my friend grabbed my arm and we ran out of the way. I have now seen my favorite protesters twice - these two guys protesting bird watching. They chant "Bird watching is bird porn, stop bird porn." Hilarious! The crazies are out - that's for certain!

In case you've been living under a rock, or without television, radio, newspaper or (god forbid) the internet, the democrats have descended upon Denver for their national convention. So far I've stayed almost completely out of the action. Aside from hanging out in downtown on my lunch breaks trying to spot celebrities, I've really not gotten that involved. The thing is that it's turning out that so many of the activities and events that are open to the public are happening during the day while I (and much of the rest of Denver) am at work. Turns out democracy really is still for politicians.

Sitting now at 4:00 on day 2 I have yet to spot anyone famous. A friend of mine saw George Stephanopolous and the most she had to say was "that guy is really short!" I've heard that there's a screen actor's guild event at one of the clubs downtown - and it would be interesting to try and crash it - or to sit at a neighboring club and try to get a glimpse. The thing is I have other plans tonight, and (gasp!) I'm just not sure it's worth it. Unless of course I had a hella good camera and could be a temporary paparazi. Eh.

I will say that while my routine hasn't been adversely affected by the whole thing it sure has been fun to have all sorts of people downtown. There is so much energy - people everywhere - and that is fun. I do not like seeing all the cops with their big guns (even if they are rubber bullets) and plastic handcuffs and tear gas. It's really strange to see them wandering around just waiting for a protest.

We'll see what happens the next two days. Hopefully some rioting free celebrity sightings :)

Lost Opportunity!

There is tons and tons of hype in Denver right now about the Democratic National Convention starting officially on Monday, but as I understand it with festivities starting as early as Saturday. Our building is going on lock-down - you have to have an access card to get into the elevators, there are extra guards checking who goes into the parking garage and many people are lobbying for our office to be closed or on barebones staff. My opinion is that this is going to turn out like Y2K - tons of hype, no real problems. I'm feel strongly enough about this to put it on my blog, and I'll eat my words if I'm wrong. (Keep in mind that I don't drive, and I think closed roads and congestion are what people are most concerned about.)

I am excited about many things for the DNC - there are bunches of activities going on downtown next week and since I love hustle and bustle I think I'm going to like having a full city. My biggest excitement though has just been given a big giant buzz kill. Flava Flav is no longer scheduled to perform a free concert next week (article here). I was counting on that to as my chance to be (as Vivian put it) the next New York, or Pumpkin or whatever fake name the Flav would have given me. I've totally lost my chance to be MTV's newest slut and I'm devestated. Crying at my desk. Guess I'll have to hook up with some other celebrity - I hear bunches of them are coming to town.

My next best chance at fame? The buzz is that Obama is staying in the Westin right next door to our building. Now occasionally I have the misfortune of looking out the window while working in my boss' office to catch some unknowing person in their birthday suit. Now I'm not saying I want to catch a glimpse of the nominee in his skivies, or that I'm going to be sitting in her window with binoculars, but it sure would be a funny story.

Summer of Swag

I'd like to officially name the summer of 2008 the Summer of Swag for me! Not only did I get to host the Nintendo girls party, I've now won an iPod Shuffle as part of the Downtown Denver Partnership's program to encourage people to take public transportation to work during the DNC next week. The point was to log how you've been commuting to work, each time you didn't drive you're entered into a drawing for prizes and today I won! How cool is that?

I would also like to give props to all you living gluten-free out there. My nutritionist suggested that I may be gluten sensitive or intolerant so I've (painfully) cut it out of my diet for the past week and a half. I'm just now starting to feel a bit better, and I can't decide what to feel if I find out that I really truly do need to go gluten-free for the long term. On the one hand, I would love to feel better, and on the other it's a big fat pain in the arse. I know I gradually learned and even embrace being dairy-free, but that took years. It's not even that I'm craving bread or anything that's blatantly filled with wheat, it's more that there is gluten in almost everything, and so doing anything is harder. I've taken reading labels to an entirely new level, and eating anywhere other than home is such a hassle. Asking for a gluten-free menu is one thing, but the (few) places I've done this had a menu full of gluten-free but dairy-heavy items. Looks like I may turn anti-social for a while until I get some of this figured out!

Mid-August Update

Hey there readers (if there are any of you left out there) - I realize I've been absent for a bit and while there are plenty of reasons why, I figured I'd just give you a quick update. (Especially since I really don't feel like working today.)

I think I posted earlier about how I was planning to see a nutrition therapist. I chose to see her mostly because I have a pretty unhealthy digestive system, which I thought was getting a bit better, but now has seemingly taken a turn for the worse. I have really enjoyed my time getting to know more about how my body uses food, and it's starting to look more and more like a Detox is in my not to distant future. If I go that direction, you're sure to read about it here.

The first few weeks of being car-free have been wonderful. I've enjoyed getting to know the bus system, have asked for very few rides, and am more motivated then ever to get a bike. I have a car on loan for the weekend and I may take advantage of that to hit some bike shops and see what's out there. I really want a cute townie bike - one with the fat tires - that I can have baskets put on the back for grocery runs. Once I have that I hope I will feel more mobile.

Burt came to visit the first weekend in August (as evidenced in the above photo above of us in Ft. Collins) and we celebrated Burtapalooza by seeing three concerts in three days. I had more fun than I imagined I could have in one weekend and I am more motivated than ever to get Burt to move out to Denver. Obviously he would love it because Sheralee and I are here, but I think there are many compelling reasons why it's time for a cross country move. :) (are you reading Burt?)

And in a final, more somber note, the brother of a dear friend passed very suddenly earlier this week. She's flown to be with her family, but thoughts of her (and the family) are with me constantly this week, making it hard for me to work today. So unfortunately I'm allowing myself to be distracted. Eh.

I hope you all are enjoying summer :) mg

I Heart the Internet

A friend of mine introduced me to a website today. A website that could quite possibly be written about me. It's call Stuff White People Like. Lest you think I'm racist or something, it's spot on social satire and based on what I read I'm surprised the authors haven't written to ask me to be on the cover of their book or their website. I have been entirely unmotivated this morning and browsed through a lot of this site. There's plenty of content there though, I'm sure I will find many more tidbits :)


For those of you keeping track, my car (or more correctly, The-car-formerly-known-as-Maria's) has made it safely to Michigan. The hand-off on Saturday morning was seamless. I can not say enough about how helpful the customer service people at RTD are. I called there, explained my situation and without looking anything up, the guy on the other end of the line gave me great advice without even hesitating. Not only that, after telling me where to go along I70, he went on to list all sorts of things about Western Michigan, I was almost sad he was a customre service person and we had to hang up! Everything he said proved to be true, the Walmart was right off the highway and two busses pulled up while I was explaining the quirks my car has. I hopped right onto one of them and had no problem getting home. My first car-free weekend was fun. I didn't miss the car at all, and got a couple decent walks in. Next up is my mission to find a good bike and a granny cart.

So Long, Farewell

Today is the last day with my car. I plan to take it to a nice candlelit dinner to let it know how much I appreciate it and how much I'm going to miss it. Well - actually I'm going to wash it and give it a full tank of gas, something makes me thing it'll appreciate that just as much.

I am ready to pass this car along to it's next driver. I've been feeling off much of this week and the only thing I can track it back to is that I think I'm not as ready to be carless as I thought. I'm realizing that deep down, in some core place, I'm anxious that not having a typical form of transportation is going to leave me more isolated than I already am. I realize in my head, that I'm only as isolated as I allow myself to be. That how connected I am or feel has nothing to do with transportation and everything to do with a load of other things. As usual, it's taking the rest of me much longer to accept and live out what I believe in my head to be true.

My Latest Claim to Fame

I've been quoted in the newspaper once or twice. The first time was in Calvin's newspaper - the Chimes, then I was quoted in the Holland Sentinel, then my blog was quoted in the Wall Street Journal Online Edition and now (drumroll please) I've been quoted in the Rocky Mountain News. Yesterday Alison and I went down to Civic Center Park for the Wednesday Farmers Market. I like going down there because I can get lunch and pick up some of the fruits and veggies I need for the week. Last week Meghan and I went, this week I went with Alison. While we were eating our lunch sitting on some benches and enjoying some cloud cover (yup - enjoying cloud cover) a reporter came and asked us about why we were there, what we thought of the park etc. Turns out I'm one of a few people who actually buys produce there - even though yesterday one farmer was selling half a bag for only $5! I got fresh green beans, summer squash zucchini, cucumber, sweet corn and a green pepper all for $5. Total steal! In any case our sentiments of enjoying the market but not feeling safe in the park was communicated even though he chose not to use Alison's great quote about "wanderers". On a separate note the savory crepes he mentioned are absolutely worth the $8 - so tasty.

T Minus 9 Days

I am 9 days away from being blissfully car free. As I've metioned here and here I've been trying to sell my car. I've had signs in the window, posted it on craigslist and talked to person after person who flaked out. After 6 months of trying to sell the car, my Dad has decided to take it off my hands, presumably for my little sister to drive. My job in the next 9 days is to make sure it'll make it across the country and then to meet friends of my parents at an exit off I-70 for the exchange!

Fridge in Heaven

Or perhaps I should call this post Highway to Hell - you decide. In any case, even though this is not a shot of my fridge, I did have one of these beautiful mini-kegs in my fridge until last night. I still have one left, and hopefully I'll be able to grab another mini-keg or two when I'm in Michigan in a couple months. (Crossing my fingers that they're still brewing it over Labor Day.)

I can not say enough that Bell's Oberon Ale is the perfect summer beer. It's refreshing and delicious and last night I, along with a few great friends, savored and enjoyed it sitting on a backyard patio, relaxing, talking, and eating. It was a perfect summer evening.

Even Though Dad Doesn't Belive in Organic Food

Well ladies and gentlemen I just signed me up for some new therapy - nutrition therapy - and let me tell you, I am excited!

In the last few months I've learned through experience that I really don't need to eat as much as I have been eating. I pulled the cabbage soup diet a couple of times, and also had a couple big allergy attacks that killed my appetite. After the last allergy attack, my appetite has never fully returned and I realized I was eating way more than I actually need and have since dropped to my lowest weight since probably college. Paired with that, I began to notice a direct correllation between eating less processed, more local food and feeling so so much better. My digestive issues are much more subdued and I can eat a piece of pizza or a small (small) ice cream cone with not much problem. I was starting to wonder whether I just had a situation where process toxins were building up in my system and making me feel lousy.

As I was making this effort to eat more local food (and a lot less meat) a nutritionist gave a talk at a meeting at work. (Those blasted meetings are a topic for another blog post.) She talked about body typing, and I don't mean that I'm pear shaped. It's more of looking at how your body deals with food and has something to do with how your glands work. From there you can make better choices about how much protien, sugar etc. to have in your diet, and when in the course of the day your body is better ready to deal with food. I'm way oversimplifying here, but this is what I remember from her presentation.

In any case, I was sold, and I'm going to start meeting with her in a couple of weeks. I hope to learn more ways to eat to make my body happy and feel better. Plus - I hope this helps me shed these last few hanging on pounds!

Half Day

Today I am thankful for the benefits of working for my company. Our office closes at 1:00 today and barring any major emergency (seriously, no one is going to die if this brochure isn't finalized) I get to leave early and I don't have to be back until Monday morning! Between a real holiday and the floating holiday I used as a vacation day this past Monday I have a 2 1/2 day week. Pretty awesome.


I've had a lot on my mind this week. One major thing is this question of whether I'm selling myself short by working at my current position. I'm sure someone could make the case to me that I am, and they would have reasons and logic and passion. I however, don't think that I am.

First, I'm in a supporting role. As much as I don't love having the title "Senior Administrative Assistant" I know that while I'm creative, I'm not a visionary. I'm good at taking what someone else has started and making it better. I'm not as strong when it comes to starting things from scratch. I have plenty of leadership qualities, I just realize, based on past job experience, that I'm still developing those skills and they're not ready to be unleashed full time. I'm hoping to get there, and, I'm 28 for crying out loud.

Second, I do have the opportunity to be creative. Within boundaries, certainly, and creative nonetheless. The more I cultivate this creative side, the more I realize that I feel most alive when I'm being creative, or am around creative people.

Third, I am paid well enough to live comfortably without having to burn the midnight oil. I crave balance almost as much as I crave creativity. This job is giving me the opportunity to fall into a rhythm of life that looks balanced. I haven't been using that opportunity to its fullest, and, like thing 1 and thing 2, this job offers me the opportunity for growth.

Fourth, I'm building relationships. I crave this too, and the job has led me to people I never would have met otherwise. I hope to find friendship and relationship all over, and yet, the job is offering something that's pretty rare at the moment - friendship.

I think the realization I've come to is that I'm not there. I'm never going to be "there," whatever that means. This job leaves me so much opportunity for personal growth and I truly believe (as I did when I took this position) that it's the right place for right now. When it's not the right place, I'll move again. I do hope however that moving jobs is not in my near future.

Yes! Michigan

I can still sing the song from the Michigan tourism commercials that aired during my childhood - Yes! Michigan, the feeling forever. That random exclamation mark is not mine - it was added by the marketing peeps.

Yes! I was in Michigan this past weekend. My friend Misty and her husband Jeff were celebrating their wedding with a reception at Johnson Park. I enjoyed the reception and the weekend. In fact on Saturday night as I was crawling into bed I realized I had done so many of my favorite things in one day, and Monday as I flew back I realized I had done so many of my favorite things that weekend. So - in lieu of a boring itinerary, here are a few of my favorite things about Michigan. (in no particular order)

The Fulton Street Farmer's Market: No, and I mean No, farmers market in Denver can ever compare to a farmers market in Michigan. This market was full of farmers, not sauces, skirts, dog treats and prepared food. I loved that you could barely move, and that there were so many choices that it felt like a challenge and a sport to find the very best produce at the very best price. Plus, there were whoopie pies right Joy? The farmers markets here should be called community markets, sure there may be one or two farmers there, but they're certainly not the focus.

The People: I got to see so many people this weekend - my family, friends, random people I ran into on accident, and Burt. Joy, Burt and I got to spend a lot of time together this weekend and it was wonderful. I wish that someone would invent an easier way to travel quickly like teleporting or something so that I could see these lovely people more often, but still live out here in Denver.

The Beach: I felt the sand between my toes. Nothing can compare to that feeling! On Sunday Burt, Joy and I went out to Grand Haven. They were having a little arts festival (I was unimpressed) and then we sat out on the channel for a while and eventually walked out to the end of the pier. It was a bit chilly (way to go random Michigan weather) but it sure was nice to walk barefoot down the pier and feel that sand.

Oberon: I love Oberon. I got to drink plenty of it, at the wedding and then out afterwards. Burt also opened my eyes to the 5 liter mini-keg of Oberon which was so much easier to get back to Denver than trying to pack up a bunch of bottles. More beer, less glass. What more can a girl ask for? I'm looking forward to sitting in the backyard, grilling out and enjoying the Oberon. I already have my orange wedges!

All in all it was a great weekend, and I can hardly believe that Burt will be here to visit in about a month and then I'll be back to Michigan at the end of August. What a busy summer!

We Love to Party

I have so much to update on that I'm not even sure where to begin. This weekend I was in Michigan for a wedding, but the night before I left I had the honor of hosting a Nintendo DS Girlfriend's Guide to Gaming party. When I first heard about the possibility of hosting this party I thought it was too good to be true, but I think it's the exception that proves the rule of "If it looks to good to be true, it probably is." My friends and I had a great time playing Nintendo and hanging out - here are a few pictures for your entertainment.

Here's Caiti and I playing Guitar Hero. It's so much fun on the DS, I still want to get the hang of actually pushing the buttons - I think my hands are too small or something, but Caiti was rocking it. So much so that the game told her to take a time out.


Jen, Beth and I also playing Guitar Hero - this is before they pulled out the headphones - the game is so much better when you can hear the song.

Sheralee and Vivian are playing Mario Kart in this photo - I like the perspective of the shot. (I'm not the photographer though!)

I was doing my brain age training and got 5 out of 5 on the race game where you have to keep track of what place the runner is in. Apparently this is unheard of (how cool am I!) and shortly after this picture was taken the Nintendo showed a rocket taking off - I think it meant that my brain is as awesome as a rocket scientist's brain.

The Nintendo DS has some sort of wireless or bluetooth technology (I may be a brand enthusiast, but I don't know all the technical details.) Here Caiti, Lindsey and I are racing eachother, but Meghan is playing something else.

This is kind of a busy shot, but I'm trying to show the grafitti mural on the wall behind us. It was super cool - I absolutely want to have another party in this space - it's in a weird industrial part of town, but the space was cool.


All in all I had a great time, and now my friends are snapping up Nintendo DS games like crazy and spending more hours than they'd like to admit playing with the little thing. The night was hella fun, and I'm feeling pretty lucky for the opportunity to have such a fun night with my friends. More on the trip to Michigan later.

Personal Observations

I've had the rare calm to step outside myself and observe. I have made the following three observations in the last 12 hours or so. I don't know what it means, just that it is.

1 - I like to think that I'm flexible, and generally I think that I am. However, I think I have the freedom to be flexible because I'm generally around people who think similarly to me. So the things they may choose are more likely to be in the realm of things I like. When I'm with people who's interests aren't as close to mine, then it's much harder to be flexible. I'm sure this is true for a lot of people, I was just struck by it this week.

2 - I tend to be a pretty cuddly person, but only when I've invited someone into my bubble. If I haven't invited someone it bothers me A LOT when they step in very close. Especially if they're chewing gum or smell like stale cigarette smoke (and yes - there are two specific people I'm referencing).

3 - Sometimes it takes sitting with someone from Michigan to remind me the reasons that I didn't feel like I fit there, and I do feel like (on certain levels) I fit here. Things like being in a diverse city (even though I feel like Denver's pretty white) that has tons of opportunities for creativity if I would just open my eyes to them.

I'm sure there's a lot more to observe, here's to having the space to see it in myself.

Hoop it Forward

It's a real club. I'm not joking, and their hula hoop was the first one I've ever been able to keep up (twss). What am I talking about? Glad you asked.

I had a lovely weekend - I got a killer haircut from Tauna at Moxie. The last person who was doing my hair abruptly left the salon I was going to with no forwarding information, and so about 2 1/2 or 3 months ago I was left without a stylist. I went to another guy at that same salon, but it wasn't the same, and just as I was in real need of a cut he went on vacation leaving me to try someone new yet again. And let me tell you I am so glad I did. I wanted to go short for summer, which I am hesitant to do after a couple of really short cuts, and after explaining that, and what I wanted I walked out of there happier than I've walked out of the salon in a really, really, really long time. Plus, I can walk there from home, so at this point I'm 97% sure that when I need to another appointment I'm so calling.

After that I putzed for a while. Had the longest most detailed house tour that I've ever endured, and Sunday afternoon went with Sheralee to Jazz in the Park. I must say that I can not believe I haven't been going to these events since I moved to Denver. They are THE perfect way to spend a summer Sunday afternoon/evening and I can not wait to spend more Sundays in the park. (Am I getting to the point of this story...?) As we were walking home we walked past a group of people who were hula hooping (is that a word?). We commented to each other that we've never been able to hula and one of the guys overheard us and let us try his hoop. After we rocked it (I mean tried it) he said - hey you can have this if you want it. Strange. So we asked a few more questions and it turns out he's in a group called Hoop it Forward - they go to parks, create hula hoops and give them away. I may just join this group because it is quirky and sounds like a random way to meet people. And now that Sheralee has a hula hoop, I'm so practicing every day.

Feeling OLD

So I've had a number of moments where I felt OLD this week!

1 - Did you know that you can't get an operator by dialing 0 anymore? I knew you couldn't from a cell phone, but now you can't even from a landline. For your reference 411 gets you an operator on the cell phone and 555-1212 gets you an operator from a land line.

2 - Last night I was out until 11:00 and I didn't know what to do with myself. I was fine - not tired at all, but I would like to have gotten more sleep.

3 - We have a new intern on my team and I really believe he needs to pull up his pants. There is no underwear showing, but his belt is halfway around his butt and his shirt is just about untucked. I'm not sure who should tell him this but he needs to know that no one will take him seriously until he pulls up his pants. My friend at work and I have nicknamed him Sir Pantsalot.

Thankfully I've had the distraction of learning to play video games as a diversion to help me feel a bit younger. Well - except for the part where Brain Age told me my brain age was 50! Just cause I'm not that great at Rock, Paper, Scissors. I am getting pretty good at the crosswords though - and I'm certain that if I had Tetris I might be skipping work. The cute little Nintendo is fun :)

Heeeey Readers

I no longer have a computer at home. Wah wha. The truth is that I've had a computer at home much longer than I really should have and so now I'm on the craigslist hunt for a used macbook or powerbook in decent condition. Based on the posting I'm seeing it shouldn't be too long before I find something that's just right. Maybe I can find someone who wants to barter a brand new one for a car...

One Small Step for Southpaws

Recently I've had the opportunity to become a brand enthusiast for Nintendo. Really. As part of the opportunity I will get to have a party for my friends in about 3 1/2 weeks and I get to try out the handheld Nintendo DS from now until then. Those of you who know me personally probably know that I'm not a gamer - I vaguely remember Super Mario Brothers and Duck Hunt from playing at friend's homes and that's it. I got my cute little Nintendo DS yesterday - it's black and it's a little blinged out, and in the 15 minutes I've started playing it so far I am so impressed that it has a feature to make it easier for us lefties to use! The game asks if you're right handed or left handed and then if you're a southpaw like me, the screen flips so that it's easier to play. Genius.

Perhaps Time is Coming to an End

Well - not in the apocolypse, end of time sense - rather I believe my time having Stanley the cat as a roommate is almost over. On Saturday I was in and out of the house and on two occasions when I came back in Stanley hissed at me. Hissed loud and with a really menacing look. It made me uneasy - like he was going to come bite me in my sleep or something. I've been thinking that we were making progress - he doesn't run right under the bed when I get up in the morning any more, he hides elsewhere until I'm moving around too much and he can't handle it. I thought that was a good sign, and then the hissing.

Anyone out there have their antisocial cat hiss at them?

Airfare - A Rant and then a Rave

I'm compelled to add my voice to the chatter about airfare I've been hearing everywhere lately. The high price of gas is affecting us all. I'm more immune than others seeing as I drive my car once or sometimes twice a week and my utilities are included in my rent, but we all know the increased price of fuel is increasing the price of pretty much everything. This past week American Airlines announced it will start charging $15 per checked bag (story) coming a couple of weeks after United (followed by a number of other carriers) announced it (they) will charge $25 for the second checked bag. I think this is a bad idea - for a number of reasons. The most basic of which goes a little like this - it seems to me that the increased price of fuel is a cost that applies to everyone on the flight, not just those people who check bags. Shouldn't it follow then that that extra cost of fuel should be passed along to everyone on the flight? Not to mention that cabin space is already at a premium so the extra people who carry-on instead of check based on these new fees is only going to cause more trouble there. Additionally, I read an article (of course I can't find it now) that talked about how many thousands of gallons of jet fuel can be saved per flight (per flight!) just by adding 2 or 3 minutes to flight times.

Now - I don't consider myself the most reasonable person in the world, more reasonable than some yes, but I can be really stubborn too. That said, I loathe the rise in gas prices almost as much as everyone else does, but I also understand that it's the way it is, at least for the moment. So - while I wouldn't be happy about it, deep down I would understand if the airlines raised prices. I don't know if I would fly less similar to all the people who are driving less, but somehow I would get it. It would suck, but I would get it. Plus - I would absolutely give 2-3 or even 10 extra minutes per flight to save fuel and money - seems better for the environment and the wallet.

Whew - enough ranting, onto raving. I have in the past month or so discovered a feature on www.kayak.com that I love. The website itself is sort of like Google for airfare. You put in your search and it looks at bunches of different sites and finds you the best price. It saves me some time when I'm searching around and gives me a good feel for prices across the board. They don't sell tickets themselves, it's just a tool to help you find the best fare. The best feature of the site (in my opinion) is the ability to track a specific itinerary. Say you were flying to visit family over Labor Day (which I am). You can tell Kayak the specific days you want to fly and they will send you a daily summary of what the best price is for those days and how much the price has gone up or down since yesterday and since the first day you started tracking. Plus (and this is my favorite part) they toss a helpful graph of fares from the last 7 days in the email so that you can glance very quickly to see what's been going on. On their website the graph is extended to the last 30 days and is a helpful tool to see what the trends are. I know that farecast.com does some if not all of these things however - they're graphing and trending (is that a word?) services are limited to large cities and they do not track the thriving metropolis that is Grand Rapids.

The best thing to happen to my travel plans though? My sister Joy. She's moving to Chicago, and since the next few trips I'm planning involve seeing family her move will allow me to fly into Chicago and save over flying into GR. Right now it's about half as much (seriously) to fly into Chicago instead of GR. Thanks Joy!

Lame

I didn't take a single picture this weekend. I really believe it's because I was just having a good time and focusing in the moment instead of focusing on pictures, but the truth is I feel really lame because I meant to take tons of pictures.

My weekend away was so fun. I saw Beth and Luke in Chicago, and even got a chance to look around in the Art Insitute. Then it was off to small-town Illinois to visit my sister and her family and meet her new baby, Dakota. There were a few moments that rubbed me the wrong way, as with any weekend spent with family, and I had a great time relaxing, playing games, sqeezing the baby, and being outside of my routine for a few days. There were some really strong storms, that actually were nice seeing as though the really rough weather stayed away from Shanna's town and we didn't have to go outside. Denver doesn't get storms like that.

Now I'm looking forward to some fun stuff here in Denver during the next couple of weeks and then heading back to the midwest at the end of June. I realized this morning that I'll be able to go to the Farmer's market while I'm there and that made me very happy on what is a gloomy gloomy morning here. Rainy and ick. I'm thankful this morning that it's a short week!

Update

I'm not terribly fierce all the time (I mean I could never take on Tyra) but my rude anonymous commenter is gone. And don't go trying to find the comment - I've taken it down.

I realize that I haven't posted an update in a while. I think a lot of the reason is that I just feel like there's not a lot going on in my life. I have a friend who assures me that I'm trying things and not finding what I'm looking for and her words encourage me to keep trying to find my own little corner of the world. In the next couple of months I'll be trying some new classes and some activities that will put me back in creative situations. I know that I feel most alive when I'm being creative, or when I'm spending time with creative people, and it's becoming more clear to me that part of me dies when I abandon creativity. I'm hopeful that I have the courage to keep trying new things.

In other news I'm excited to take a trip to the middle of nowhere to visit my sister's house and spend time with my family and meet my new little niece. I haven't been out of town in a good long while and so I'm hoping that a little break will be good - it almost always is. Plus I get to see Beth and Luke which will be great.

So - here's to a break and to jumping back into the creative world. I think it's going to be a great summer!

If you can't play nice, play elsewhere

Dear A--hole from the Indiana Department of Education using the computer at IP address 165.138.203.253, most likely in room 229 of the State House:

Your mean-spirited comments are unwelcome here. If they continue I will work harder to track down and report you to the proper authorities.

Drums Please

It is with great pleasure that I introduce to you Dakota Grace Grigoletti. This newest member of my family was born to my sister and her husband on Tuesday, May 13 and weighs in at 7 lbs, 8 oz and is 21 inches long. I'm going to meet her next weekend and I'm so freakin' excited I can barely stand it. I'm also excited to get out of Denver and spend a weekend with my entire family minus Joy. (sorry Joy) May I also say (because you are all thinking it) "step aside angelina jolie's children!" This girl has the lips :)

Rut-Roh

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, Pets, Readers - I find myself caught in a rut. The strange thing is, I'm not highly motivated to get out of it. I see it's destructive possibilities, I see the boredom beginning to creep, no rushing, in. Yet, I have no energy for busting out. Hopefully this realization will turn into motivation soon.

Home Sick

I am having an allergy attack. I think. Or maybe a cold. Who knows - in any case I'm pretty congested and have that awesome congested voice and almost no energy or appetite. So I used that as a legitimate excuse to stay home from work today. I really like being home sick when I'm lethargic but not vomiting :)

The silver lining to what I think is allergies is that Denver is truly coming into spring. There are budding and flowering trees everywhere and it's absolutely beautiful. The other beautiful thing is that today's high of 59 is the LOWEST high for the entire week. So if I have to endure allergies in order for spring to come, then by all mean, bring it allergies. Bring it.

Pretty Day

Today was gorgeous here in Denver. I think high 60s maybe even 7o and it was a nice easy day. This afternoon I headed downtown with Vivian for Doors Open Denver - an event in conjunction with Architecture week where many of Denver's buildings - historic and otherwise - are open to the public. Some have tours and others you can just look around in. The pictures are from the top of the Daniels and Fischer Tower. Until the age of the skyscraper it defined the Denver skyline. Now the department store is gone and the tower is used mainly for offices. The balcony at the top is only open to the public during this one weekend and it was pretty cool.

I also made a pot roast today. Here's to good ole fashioned family pot roast.

This American Life

I like to listen to NPR on Saturdays. Yes - you read right - the car guys are on and my two favorites, Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me and This American Life. Today TAM was about leaving something you thought you never wanted to go back to and then missing part of it later. The third act was about a group of nuns and their story had a lot of similarities to my story of being in Denver. You can listen here if you want. (Although I'm not sure if you have to listen to the entire thing or not.)

Defrosting the Freezer

Excuse me while I jump back to about 1974 for a few minutes today. I'm defrosting my freezer - I have never done this before while I actually had stuff in the fridge. When I moved into this apartment the freezer was crazy frosted over, but I left it unplugged and propped open for about 24 hours and that did the trick. Now that I live here I can't really do that. So - I purposely stopped buying things that go in the freezer and when it emptied (this morning) I went after defrosting it. Thankfully there are directions on the inside of the door and they're working quite well. This is NOT as bad as cleaning out the tub though - and I have to do it much less frequently.

My Mom was in Denver last weekend and we had a fun time hitting up a couple museums, watching a guy walk into a window (no joke), shopping, and heading up to Steamboat to sit in the Hot Springs. I heart those hot springs, and aside from a little snow between the tunnel and Silverthorne (yup - all 5 miles of it) we had an easy drive and a great time. I even found a pretty pair of new jeans up there - and we all know how hard jeans are to fit!

The rest of this week I kinda felt like I was recovering from going going going all weekend. I think I'm getting old - or at the very least lazy. We also got some snow this week (blech) which I'm sure took my energy level down a bit. Thankfully we're supposed to be in the 70s Monday and Tuesday so I'm ready to break out the summer things. Hopefully that was Denver's last snow until next season.

Other than that not a helluva lot going on here. I guess that's enough.

Thanks Colorado!

I believe that last friday there was a bank robbery in the building I work in. There were more than a half dozen Denver police cars, guys in FBI vests and other obvious plain clothes authorities running around outside. The bank branch in the lobby was closed and there was caution tape all over inside.

Why do I tell you this? Well - the rest of the afternoon I was trying to find information about the incident online. Nothing has ever shown up - however - I did read a story about the Great Colorado Payback. The Treasury of the Colorado has property that belongs to people who haven't claimed it. The story said you could go to a website, enter your name, and find out if there was any for you. It seemed stupid to me not to give it a shot (don't ask, don't get, right Mary?) so I entered my name. To my great surprise there's $178 there for me! To make it even sweeter the website will even print out the form with all the correct information and all you have to do is get the form notarized and mail it in with a photocopy of your driver's license and SS card. I took care of it today and hopefully my $178 will come soon.

Click here if you want to check and see if Colorado has anything for you.

Go GR?

HA! Tonight I'm doing laundry, and I put America's Next Top Model on for some noise and to watch in the inbetween times. I used to watch ANTM regularly, but this is the first episode I've seen this season. It's the one where they go to see different designers and someone wins. And to my surprise one of the designers was Pamella Rolland. I completely cracked up! A designer from Grand Rapids on ANTM. Crazy!

Lesson Learned

Today's lesson boys and girls is to skip yoga if you're feeling gassy to begin with.

I ate a lot of candy at work today. It tasted great, and my finicky digestive system was busy screaming at me by the time I was walking home from work. I chose to go to the last of my yoga basics classes - I enjoy them, I like the idea of taking these four classes in weekly installments as they're intended, and since I've heard a few farting-at-yoga-class stories, I thought maybe it would help clear me up. Ha. I didn't fart in class. However - all that moving around and stretching and "it's even good for your organs" has got me all mixed up inside. I honestly feel like I could fart out of my ears. Do you think that would get me in some sort of record book?

I'm still hoping that the yoga got the digestive crazy moving more quickly than it normally would, but only time will tell. I promise I won't keep you updated.

Happy Easter!

I hope you had a beautiful holiday. I went to a service this morning and then enjoyed a beautiful brunch of mussels and frites and a little salad with a couple friends. Not your traditional ham, and I still ate too much :)

Happy St. Patty's Day!

I only had one beer and it wasn't even green. However - there was a real live Irish band in a tent and more people wearing green in one room than I've ever seen. I heart holidays! Now it's off to yoga. What a random day.

Isn't she pretty! I'm selling this beauty for the bargain price of $2,000.00, but if you're interested you better hurry. On Saturday I finally took the car through the car wash, put the for sale signs in the window, took pictures and posted them on craigslist. I haven't had any response to my craigslist ad yet, however, one of my neighbors has expressed strong interest and is getting back with me today to let me know if he could come up with the money or not. So - who knows - by this time next week I may be carless :)

In other news - my birth date has been updated with the insurance company so I'm good there. Sweet.

Rant: Health Care

Okay - so somehow my birthdate is listed wrong in my account for all my new healthcare. This means that if I call with a question, or in my case today, to have a prescription filled, I keep getting told that since I can' t verify my birthdate, by law none of the details of my account can be discussed with me. I've known about this for at least a week, and I've asked my contact at the company to have it updated in the systems - and it doesn't really matter what I say, I can't seem to convey that I can't get medical service until this is taken care of. I'm paying for a service that's unavailable to me.

Today the lady on the phone went as far as to tell me about people's wallets being stolen and prescriptions being purchased with stolen insurance cards. Fine. Oh wait. My birthdate is listed on my drivers license, so if my wallet were stolen someone would have my birthdate as well as my insurance card. Such a great law.

This is a service that I'm paying for - but it seems like I have no say in the whole works. I wonder if it really does save me money to get my insurance through my employer or, if I would be better off to take the payout from the company and invest in my own insurance that I made the desicions for, that the insurance company would be able to change my birthdate if I told it to, and that I wouldn't have to talk to someone who had to talk to someone who had to talk to someone to get a small change that affects me directly made.

Admittedly this is not a life or death prescription - but it could be. What if I needed my insulin, or heart medication, or any number of vital prescriptions? I would be in a life or death situation right now - instead of a it'll be a couple of weeks before I'm healthy situation.