The week in review

It's certainly been a week of highs and lows. I'm coming up with my plan at work - and loving it! Reminds me that it's what I really do like - creating marketing materials and hoping so so hard that it's going to work!

I realized today that I'm going to Michigan in 16 days...how exciting is that!

There was a meeting on Tuesday that was destined to be hard. I pray that healing can begin here in Denver and that LOVE is brought to the world and to us in increasing ways through what comes next. The possibility is there, I can feel it. I hope we can figure out together how to bring it to life.

I've had wonderful moments at a concert and the porch.

Mia the cat peed on a bunch of clothes in my room. I know I know - I left my clothes on the floor - that still didn't give her any right to pee on it! Then I think I wore a skirt that I didn't realize got peed on to work. Grossing me out. So I had to go home at lunch to change...oh the randomness.

My roommate's been gone - and she's coming home today! I like it better when she's here.

Oh - and I still want to be Karen Walker...thankfully I had a chance to practice being her a bit this week!

A plan

So I've come up with a game plan as far as work is concerned. I'm still not thrilled with the cold calling/telemarketing position that is "Marketing Associate" and my job. I think that my calling could be much more effective if the people I were calling had at the very least expressed a tiny bit of interest in the company. I know, I'm brilliant - thanks GRS. So since the boss is out of town for the next 5 work days I'm going to pull together a proposal. Quite frankly the more I'm on the phone the more I want out of this job. I'm just afraid that my resume will start to scream FLAKE...this girl's a FLAKE! And yet - I don't think I can call call call for the next year.

The other thing is that I really just want to be Karen Walker for a living. She's married to a husband she loves (even if she won't admit it) who funds her every move and she gets to shop and drink and play all day. Too bad that's a television character and completely unrealistic!

Let's hope by the time Cheyenne is in her twenties there's some other way to live :)

Questions, and some answers too

Well I tried a couple of posts last week and all of them just felt like a tiny bit too much for posting for all to read in cyberspace. Long story short, I think the realization I came to is that it's anxiety that puts me into old patterns. (If you're reading between the lines that means I was feeling a bit anxious last week.) And I think I'm in another stage of questioning...I am not catching on to this new job...and I really don't like cold calling - which is what I'm doing. So I'm thinking about looking for a different job once again!

I am thankful to have had a chance to get away to the mountains this weekend. I spent a night in Breckenridge with Vivian and her family and it was awesome to get away. To the point we were planning more trips! And I had a great time Friday celebrating Beth's last night at the Avenue with her and Frank.

We'll see what happens next!

What the?

Something for the "I never needed to see that" file:

Last night after a big afternoon of visiting the Pier 1 Clearance Center and WalMart Vivian, Sheralee and I were grilling hamburgers on our new grill and having dinner on the porch. Now if you follow this blog, or know me you know that there is often some thing interesting to watch off our porch. We like to say that it's better than any reality TV show we've ever seen. Well last night was the first appearance of "topless girl." It was quite sad actually. There was a woman who was obviously drunk or strung out on something and was irate about who knows what. At some point she went up onto the porch of the homeless coffee shop, and was yelling and fussing with her shirt. Turns out she had untied the straps of her halter top at some point and all of a sudden the entire shirt was around her waist. There were some guys from the homeless coffee shop talking to her for a minute, I assume trying to calm her down, and eventually she walked off toward the west and I'm sure she flashed at least a few cars after that. I assumed we would see her again over the course of the night; she never did come back.

In other news:

I find myself in patterns I haven't been in for a little while and I'm not sure what's at the core of it. Old patterns like not returning phone calls or emails, having a hard time being alone, and not being able to settle for the life of me. I hope to find out what's underneath it...feels like some old stuff resurfacing. Sweet.

Some realizations

So I've come to some realizations over the weekend. (Which was awesome despite the rain...included hot tubbing, eating, dancing, new tires and unfortunately not a minute of porch sitting.)

1 - I've got myself convinced that I'm not going to be any good at my new job. For that reason I was completely slacking off at work including doing things like posting on my blog while at the office. I want to be good at this job and it's possible that the only thing keeping me from that is me. Here's to the stubborn "I can do this" side of me!

2 - I put too much pressure on dating. I don't know how to just get to know someone on a date because I've got too many other things on my mind. I want to just get to know someone - I don't have to figure out deep stuff on the first date and I don't have to think about whether I could marry someone every time I go on a date. Perhaps it can just be about getting to know someone in their core.

3 - I missed out on a helluva lot by not hanging out in high school. This weekend I spent a good amount of time doing nothing with my friends. It seemed as though we moved from place to place only to do nothing but enjoy each other and relax at each new place. It's taken me until 26 to understand and find the joy of this. I'm so thankful for that now - I think that what's got me a little sad about how long it's taken to get here.

4 - In all of this I'm consistently reminded that in the end it's Jesus, freedom, restoration, transformation and living in reality that I want. That I want to orientate my life towards. That I want to find in increasing ways.

Here's to living life to the full!

The Trip

Now that I've sufficiently slacked off here's some pics of the baby and the weekend :) I put more pictures on my fotki site, and since I didn't know if my sister really wanted them posted all over there's a password. Email me and I'll send you the password.

The weekend was really fun! After I got over my contempt {buzz} for airline workers I really did enjoy the weekend. My parents were down for the first couple of days - I stayed with them at a Drury Inn with FREE happy hour! Yup - free. And the rest of the weekend was spent with my sisters at Shanna and Dave's house. We played parchesi, watched movies and tried to keep cool in the heat with broken air conditioning! I did get to see Jason Mraz in concert under the arch, and we played for a little while at the St. Louis Science Center. All in all it was a great weekend and I did NOT want to come back to Denver. (but more on that another time.)

While I was in St. Louis I picked up some Oberon!!!! And while I was picking it up at a Whole Foods in suburban St. Louis I ran into a girl I knew in college - so random! And on Wednesday Sheralee, Jim and I enjoyed what I still believe may be the best beer on the planet! There are three bottles left...mmmm. I don't think they'll last the weekend.

Stop harrassing me for pictures!

This is what happens when you're irresponsible...

...your friends end up changing the tire on your car, in a flood and a lightning storm while you sit at the airport feeling sick for not getting new tires even though you knew they were going bad. Mark is awesome for doing this! (well for a lot of reasons really - and in this moment for changing my tire in a flood and rain storm.)

I know this is not the picture you all were hoping for - I'll have baby pics soon - they're just caught on my camera yet. Because of this adventure I was tired by the time I got home last night and the pictures are still on my camera - hopefully I'll take care of that tonight.