Porch

I've been feeling fairly insecure, unsafe, and uncentered recently. Thank you for letting me leave it at that, and not get into it on the blog. Over the weekend Sheralee and Jim worked to fix up the porch. They put down jute pieces for a rug and Sheralee planted bunches of flowers and got out candles. It's beautiful, cozy and pleasant out there now! And so we've been sitting out there and it's helped and hurt all at the same time. It's been a place for beautiful community on a number of occasions since Saturday, that's helpful. And it's reminded me how much I loved sitting on the porch at Sheralee's house in GR - talking with Burt, drinking Sangria with Cherry and I miss the ease all of that was. It seems like everything in Denver is 19 times harder than it ever was in GR, sometimes unnecessarily.

Tonight when Vivian and I were sitting out there we saw a beautiful double rainbow - this picture does not do it justice. And I wonder if this is my flood. Mostly I think that's what I want to believe - that this is a time of intense cleansing and that while I'll always be growing, learning, transforming that it won't have to be like this again. I don't think it's realistic...it's just what I want.