Krispy Kreme, Baby Foxes and a Desire for Connection

So after a day of meeting with the president that I thought was going to be training I was exhausted! And stayed home to watch American Idol and then I watched an entire hour of Scrubs. And then I felt lonely. So I called Sheralee to see if anyone was still hanging out at Vivian's and they convinced me to come over. We watched something for a few minutes and then drove all the way to Aurora for Krispy Kreme. Mmmmm. And on the way home Jim was telling us how he'd seen a fox on 7th street the other night. As I was claiming that he was lying Sheralee saw a fox cross the street ahead of us (on 7th) and then we saw these two babies playing on the side of the road. They were terribly cute and ended up going down the storm drain - that must be where they live.

It was a beautiful time and then when I got home I was still painfully sad and lonely. To the point where I just start wondering what the hell is wrong with me and why I have no patience and whether I'm just plain closed off to the connection and love I desire. Thankfully I was able to get it out and talk about it with Sheralee who beautifully spoke truth into my lies. Thankfully today was better. At the same I'm starting to wonder if it changes. If connection and transformation is possible. Whether a constant longing for connection ever diminishes. Today is May 17 - exactly 8 months after I arrived in Denver. Does the loss of the familiar ever get easier? Will this place ever feel as familiar as the last place? Or will I always feel graspy for connection?